He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
i wish my penis had a tongue
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
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