I only kidnapped one of them. chill
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
whose parrot is this?
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
