it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Randomize
