her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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