I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
