I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Randomize
