If i could tip my vagina, i would.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
