I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
I didn't notice because vodka
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
