just come out here and I will go home with you...
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Randomize
