Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
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