what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
