thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
