Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
