I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
