Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
please come you make the beer taste better
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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