i wish peter jackson would direct porn
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
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