THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
So squirting runs in the family.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize
