I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Randomize
