A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
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