Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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