"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
