you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
