I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
