You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
