why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
whose ass print is on the piano?
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
