Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Ladies don't puke and tell
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Randomize
