Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
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