Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
this will be a night to untag.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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