he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
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