I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
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