Where is the hickey?
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
No subtext here. People are naked.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Randomize