That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I will be naked everywhere
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Randomize
