Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize