Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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