i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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