Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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