just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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