how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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