i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
