Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
she told me i tasted like america
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Still dying that you shit outside
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
