I think my vagina is haunted
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
you didnt know i had herpes?
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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