I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
