wakey wakey hands off snakey
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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