is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
