Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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