I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
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