By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Randomize
