id be glad to
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
