have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Randomize
