you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Randomize
