im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize
