I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
It's never too late to be topless.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
The air taste purple.
Randomize
