I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize